Dating Generation Y Style
Every generation is different and Generation Y (those born between 1978-1990) is no exception. We’re like Generation X on steroids. All the things that shaped Generation X: globalization & technology (Boeing 747), immediacy of information (internet), crumbling family structure (divorce) are reaching new heights. MTV has taught Generation Y to filter information at rapid pace and the iPhone not only gives us the power of google at our fingertips — we can take it with us in our pocket!
The prevailing parenting structure of Gen Yers had our elders letting us believe we could be anything we wanted to be. Many youth sports today incorporate a “no-cut policy“. We were winners if we just showed up for the game. People call it positive reinforcement. I call it bullshit.
The typical Gen Yer boy believes he’s the best thing since sliced bread. He’s a winner because he’s been told he’s special, different, and unique his whole life. And he probably is all of the above because his mother needed fertility drugs to help in his conception at age 35+. While growing up, he was coddled and cooed at as if he was the next Messiah. If I want to date him, I have to become Mary Magdalene. She’s the “penitent sinner” aka reformed whore, and the questionable wife of Jesus.
That must be why some girls dress like whores. They haven’t quite figured out the reform part yet.
I feel for you. As an X-er both by birth date and mental attitude, I kinda don’t get the Y entitlement thing. I thought we were slackers, and largely we were, but wow, the Y’s can waste a lot of time.
As for the Y girls, yeah, there is a lot of that too. I don’t get the super slut and gamer boi combination. I saw another such couple this weekend, and my cognitive dissonance was intense. I guess when your choices are slim, you learn to like what you get.
Now that I think about it, I should probably bump the low end of my online dating match’s age range up by another couple of years…
Love your writing.
This makes so much sense. I never thought to carry that model over to dating. I’m officially Gen X, but some older Gen Yers are within my dating range, so I get the best of both worlds. Ha. Though, I have to admit, I’m guilty of Gen X slackerdom in dating, too.
This reminds me of something in the Dr. Drew story in the NY Times magazine a week or two ago. He said that he started doing Loveline because the sex advice of Dr. Ruth (shed your inhibitions! have fun!) just didn’t apply to the younger generations. I wonder how the whole “He’s Just Not That Into You” stuff applies to Gen Y, especially. Do the entitled boys ever figure it out and start adjusting their expectations to reality? Will there just be a lot more single people in the US? Or will divorce rates skyrocket because so many people have such high expectations, they think they’re “settling” even when they find someone great?
thanks paula. i kinda crush on your writing too AND movie making skills. i even moved into your neighborhood!
I think sometimes the entitled boys figure it out and adjust, but not until later. The average age of marriage has steadily risen in industrialized nations. Also, there’s the trend away from marriage. I fully understand the possibility that I might never be married but that doesn’t mean I won’t be happy.